. No! No! It makes sense… Just think about it… Madonna is 50 and like a virgin in her Sticky & Sweet Tour in Rome… Clearly the Grandma of Pop is merely a lost sheep looking for some sort of deep, revelatory, religious experience… This is why, while in Rome the ancient pop icon dedicated the song “Like a Virgin” to Pope Benedict XVI. From one human relic to another… Just a tad of conservative, choir-practice, altar-boy yummy, touchy-feely, masturbation on a little piece of revirginated vaginal meat…
Archive for the 'Madonna' Category
Believe it or not but Madonna is Yoga zeexy… The mummy of pop looks rather perky for a deceased old lady that’s been through a dozen failed autopsies… But this is what happens when you mix Yoga stretching with horse tranquilizers, bovine growth hormones, and Prince Charles’ semi-digested seminal fluid…
Continue reading ‘Warning: Yoga Can Make You Look Like Madonna - Zeeexy!’
It’s a real shame… In her old age, Pop Grandma Madonna has apparently found it appropriate to flash her thong adult diapers around via repeated crotch thrusts. If Guy Ritchie would have any mercy on his elders he would gag Madonna with a roll of quarters from her pension, get her some proper old lady cotton underwear, instead of these perverted nickers she’s exhibiting around, and ban yoga, Zen, Tantric masturbation and sex from his house.
It’s just sad to watch her try and try again and again to come up with overproduced dejections such as Give It 2 Me. This is one straight for the senior citizens collections… watching her flop her expired flesh around like some piece of roadkill which is about to die but with muscular reflexes still active… just sad…
Pop grandmother Queen Madonna goes lesbian in her old age. I get it… this grandma swapped saliva with red-neck born retard Britney Spears and the other one that nobody cares about who can hit the same pitch as rabid bats Christina Aguilera a couple of years back, and apparently she got a taste for it.
Now she did it again, going for a tad of soft candy with her hard candy performance in Paris. But what better way to celebrate Paris than salivating into someone else’s mouth, even if she is the same sex as Madonna. Well, in her old age it doesn’t matter anyway. Once Madonna hit pension-time just around the corner from menopause she was as good as an asexual. Just think about it, it’s like kissing your grandmother… I said think about it, not masturbate to it, you perverts!!!
Continue reading ‘Grandma Madonna Goes Lesbian in Her Old Age’
Let’s all chip in and fix Madonna’s monkey… Oh, my bad, I meant to say daughter… O.K., O.K… My first reaction when I saw it was to reach for my bat… All right, no lies!!! My first actual reaction was the inherent vomit reflex… And then instead of reaching for my bat, I actually made her beautiful as you can see in the image below…
Can you imagine waking up next to this pop queen mutant offspring in the morning? I mean, motherf****r!!! I wouldn’t know whether to jump out the window or smash its face in with the broken leg from a chair…
Can you imagine waking up next to this pop-freak love bastard in the middle of the night? I can already feel the little-girl screams forming in my throat… And trust me, I’m a big guy, you don’t wanna hear me scream like a little girl…
The only explanation that I have for Lourdes’ face is of course related to Madonna practicing crotch thrusts relentlessly. Combine crotch thrust after crotch thrust with pig growth hormones and you OF COURSE get Yoga! Of course!!! And a daughter that looks like the star of Planet of the Apes, special effects included!
But you can help Lourdes from getting thrown in the Zoo, by chipping in a few cents. Now it’s not that Madonna is pour. According to The Sun, Madonna is about to get some £12.5 million for two gigs in Dubai, and another £5 million for attending a private party.
“The negotiations for the tour to stop in Dubai in November are being finalised and she will get £7.5million for the one show only. The figure is so big because of her new contract with Live Nation and the huge funds available from private promoters in Dubai. She is also close to agreeing to play at a private party in Dubai, the first in her career,” a source revealed.
Then why in the name of the dieting Buddha would Madonna let Lourdes walk around with so much unshaven facial hair? Isn’t this a clear example of animal cruelty?
Continue reading ‘Let’s All Chip in and Fix Madonna’s Monkey/Daughter’
All you people in Internets land, gather around to hear this retarded brilliant message from the grandmother of the queen of pop, which by now is either Michael Jackson or Marilyn Manson. Take your pick.
Ohhh, sweet old fart Madonna! Thou is as vibrant as the pollen inside pissed-on daisies… Or as a piece of semi-dead flesh, corroded by Alzheimer. When you stop performing yoga ballet and start emitting human speech the world stands still and vomits…
After hearing your message, dear pension freak Madonna, this is my message for you… Please, please go and fu…
Now here is the new 2008 Calendar from Madonna. Enjoy!!!
Are you ready for the next pop horror show? Well this time it’s not about Paris Hilton’s new pink homosexual Chihuahua pet monkey or about Britney Spears’ vagina fur on display. Noooooo…! This is about old ass pop grandma queen Madonna looking like she swallowed a bucket of horse steroids and then had some bovine growth hormones injected into her.
Let this be a warning to all post-menopause women! Lay off the f*****g yoga! For grandmas like Madonna there are always pissing contests, penis measuring contests or even golden showers or other alternative water sports that they can win with no problems… Otherwise you’ll just get similar results to horror transforming Madonna like in Vanity Fair Fear! Just look at those biceps!!! She’s sweating pure testosterone!
Continue reading ‘Be Very Very Afraid, Madonna Is Transforming!’
Have no fear… at an age when other women are cruising grandmother style, Madonna is still trying to look 15! Please, please, please! Remind this old bag to take her medicine, and to keep her knickers ON! Yes, even when she’s peeing, that’s why they got adult diapers! And then do tell her that she’s in her sixties, old, boring, tired and expired. One of these days she’s bound to get a broken hip from those yoga perverted gymnastics she’s been practicing, and maybe that will be the end of her…
Madonna looks like she’s 70 as she exits Entrecote restaurant at Checkpoint Charlie. Madonna has been flashing her yoga trained sclerosis at the Berlin Film Festival 2008.
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