Archive for the 'Random Hollywooditoria' Category

Brad Pitt Is Lactose Intolerant for Angelina Jolie

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at October 9, 2008 in Angelina Jolie and Random Hollywooditoria | . 1 Comment

Brad Pitt Is Lactose Intolerant for Angelina Jolie

Can you believe this! No! You have got to look at this picture of Angelina Jolie breastfeeding one of her twins (Knox or Vivienne) on the November 2008 cover of W Magazine, and ask what in the world was Brad Pitt doing playing around with a camera and taking pictures of his wife!

I always knew that Pitt was a disgusting and worthless piece of meat, but this is absurd! The fact that he was taking pictures instead of milking Angelina for the last drop of milk proves nothing more. Angelina Jolie, now mother-of-six and successfully building her own multi-continental and pluri ethnic tribe was photographed in the backyard of her and Pitt’s French Chateau this August.

Angelina revealed to Parade: “I have two divorces behind me but I’m still good friends with both my exes, Billy Bob Thorton and Jonny Lee Miller. I’ve never had to deal with secrets from the men in my life because I’ve always married artists and they’re a very talkative and expressive bunch. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Halle Berry Is the Sexiest Woman Alive - Esquire Magazine

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at October 8, 2008 in Random Hollywooditoria | . 1 Comment

Halle Berry Is the Sexiest Woman Alive - Esquire Magazine

Men’s style magazine Esquire has boosted Halle Berry on top of the female food chain… Believe it or not but Halle is the sexiest woman alive… I hear the deceased are rotting in their graves with envy! Here is what Halle had to say:

“I don’t know exactly what it means, but being 42 and having just had a baby, I think I’ll take it. “Sexiness is a state of mind, a comfortable state of being. It’s about loving yourself in your most unlovable moments.

“I share this title with every woman, because every woman is a nominee for it at any moment.”

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Sneak Peek: Britney Spears New Music Video “Womanizer”

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at October 7, 2008 in Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Britney Spears New Music Video \

This sneak peek at Britney Spears’ new music video “Womanizer” provides ample proof that red-necks should be put down at 25.

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Can You Spot the Difference Between a Lady and a C**ksucker?

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at October 7, 2008 in Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Halle Berry

No really… take a look at these pictures… One is a lady and the other a mere prostitute who by some sort of surgical miracle managed to scrap the expired petrified traces of sperm from her face and throat. You have Halle Berry on one side and Jodie Marsh on the other. Can you spot the lady and the c**ksucker?

Jodie Marsh

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Just Married: Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds

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at September 28, 2008 in Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Just Married: Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds

After they announced their engadgement in May, Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds confirmed that they are in “just married” status with the wedding having happened this weekend. Johansson is 23, Reynolds is 31.

Look at This Stupid Cow Abusing Her Locomotive Apparatus

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at September 24, 2008 in Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Look at This Stupid Cow Abusing Her Locomotive Apparatus

Look at this stupid cow abusing her locomotive apparatus… No really now… It is obvious to me  that fashion is actually about hating the real women… and also about models hating real women and themselves to participate in this sorry circus. Fact is, you have got to start questioning your intelligence level when you can’t even perform the most basic of locomotive functions. On the other hand… considering how much time models spend on their knees or on their backs it’s always a nice surprise when they manage to stand up quasi-straight.

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She’s Still Alive?! Quik, Get My Bat, I’ll Fix It!

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at September 24, 2008 in Hollywood wannabe and Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Shannen Doherty

You have got to be kidding me. Shannen Doherty is still alive and kicking! I thought she jumped off the map into a no zip code area after the whole 90210 vomit fest… Why is she making a come-back all of a sudden? Who is the sick masochist that wants to masturbate looking at this epitome of adolescent pushing 40???

On how it felt to be hated by the tabloids:
“I was exploring who I was as a person and testing my own boundaries and trying to be a normal 18-, 19-, 20-year-old, and I got raked over the coals. Many nights I cried myself to sleep over that stuff.”

On the worst lie she ever read about herself:
“There’ve been so many. One of those bullshit rags [wrote that I'd entered AA]. They said that I was so, quote, ’scared of the drink’ that I was sleeping on my sponsor’s couch. Now, I’ve never been in AA. I accompanied my husband to AA meetings—actually, I forced him to go to one—but I’ve never actually gone for myself. Sometimes you can find some truth, a little nugget somewhere, but not one thing about this was true … But people sell their stories and make their 500 bucks at your expense, and it’s like, ‘Wow. Really?’”

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Somebody Give Lindsay Lohan $2 to Go Home

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at September 24, 2008 in Lindsay Lohan and Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Somebody Give Lindsay Lohan $2 to Go Home

Don’t you just love it when these perfect Disney star wonder rejects end up old decrepit shells sucked of all life the minute they hit 20? Don’t you just get physical pleasure from seeing perfectly marketable success stories turn to monumental failures over night? Don’t you just get a kick out of seeing these poor half retarded starlets whoring themselves as the cheap prostitutes they really are?

No? Really ?!?!?! Well, we can’t all be like Pope Benedict and spread nothing but love while crucified on a swastika…

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Kim Kardashian Monstruous Half-Meter Long Labia

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at September 23, 2008 in Kim Kardashian and Random Hollywooditoria | . 0 Comments

Kim Kardashian Monstruous Half-Meter Long Labia

Kim Kardashian wearing spandex tights is an abomination against all possible aesthetic norms… Kim was either photographed with her back turned and that is her fat cellulite drowned ass or she has half-meter long labia.  Seeing Kim’s monstrous public vagina you can tell even with spandex tights on that that thing is torn up in the worst way. All I have to say is “Say hello to my HUGE friend freak vagina!!!

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Triana Iglesias Black Lingerie FHM Pictorial

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at September 22, 2008 in Lingerie, Random Hollywooditoria and Sexy Pictorial | . 0 Comments

triana iglesias

So what if Triana Iglesias doesn’t exactly look feminine…? So what if she looks like an eunuch? Since when does having the face of a 40 years old man disqualifies Triana Iglesias from being all woman?

“My name is Triana and I am half Norwegian, half Spanish.. My mum is from Asturias in Spain, but I was born and raised in Oslo, Norway… Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to be a superhero. - Wonderwoman “feemale force in a bikini!” ;) saving the world with superhero powers. Now I am living in Oslo,and I still want to save the world with super powers…
I am a good girl, and Great fun! ( Even when I’m bad ) For the last couple of years I have been working full time as a model, and trying to enjoy life to the full. And I Love it! I love my life and my job…”

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